Tuesday, October 11, 2016
Story time/rant: based on my previous blog, you know that I moved to NYC err Brooklyn in order to get close to all these cool social media marketing jobs and snag one for myself. Well that hasn't happened. On top of that, New York costs so much money, like beyond the expensive that I was prepared for, that my savings is nearly gone. Besides NY's atrocious rent (and other fees) costs, I have a LOT of bills/debts to pay every month too. So yeah, I might lose all of my belongings as well as my room in an apartment if I don't find a job soon. And yes, I am actively applying EVERYWHERE!
I try to vent to my new friends and all they can offer is "try harder", they give me a list of tasks I should do to help find a job, as if after 5 months I haven't tried all of that already, even while falling deeper and deeper into a depression that I can't afford to have (no insurance), I continue to try. I have a bachelors degree, a master's degree, and over 10 years of work experience, but since I don't know the "right people" or didn't think of a great and witty way to get them to read my resume, I can't get hired to work. Not even jobs that pay little and I am well over qualified for will hire me, so exactly how am I supposed to live as a not so young adult???
Meanwhile up in the Kim Kardashian suite, *GASP* she got robbed of millions in jewelry, but still has her mansion, livelihood, and ass to sell in order to earn it all back in a month or two. Not that theft is ok, or that she deserved it, but in ranking the greatest tragedies even of this week, the Kim K robbery isn't one of them, but you know, priorities... This is truly an F'd up world that we live in.
Sure this may make me seem like one of those bitter, entitled, whining millennials that seems to be the IT topic to discuss these days. Stupid, cocky, good for nothing millennials always wanting to get not a job, but a career, that affords them the ability to settle down, own a house and car and raise a family. How greedy, selfish, and entitled we are, the nerve! But from what I have witnessed from many of the people that I have met in my adult, career minded life, what I said above is true and it is legitimately how this world works, as bitter as I may sound (and may actually be). Sure there may be people who can go to school, get some experience, fill out some resumes online, get the call back and interview with no outside help, no excessive research studying and effort put in. I for one hope that it is possible for at least some people! But for the most part, as the saying goes, "it's WHO you know, not WHAT you know" and though I know a lot of people, and I am grateful for them, they are clearly not the people who can get me a job at all, let alone in the field that I want to work in. And I am sick of being depressed, worried, and anxious about what will happen when the day finally comes that I can no longer afford to support myself, as I have for the last 8 years. It's a horrible, draining, feeling, yet I am still trying everyday to find work and prevent myself from becoming homeless. I can take UNIQUE suggestions on how to get a job, but I just can't stand to hear one more person tell me "go apply on LinkedIn, indeed, monster, go to job fairs and network, sell some of your things, go work retail until you get a better job" I have and am trying that and it's not working so please, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!!!
Food for thought: check out this article from Elite Daily, of the "genius" who will likely get a job through admittedly really smart thinking, but excessive effort and bribery (even if it is just donuts), "Clever Guy Landed 10 Job Interviews By Hiding Resume In A Box Of Doughnuts". Yes I am jealous that I didn't think to do that first, back when I actually had money to spend, but I am also bitter that such extreme measures are necessary just to get a chance at a position in this day and age. Anyone else experiencing hardships finding a job these days even when you are trying many different routes and maybe even over qualified for the job? How about those who got creative like the doughnut guy and landed a position?
Thursday, May 12, 2016
Storytime: My NYC Roommates Have an Attitude with Me and Get Caught in a Lie Days Before I am Moving In (with text evidence)!!!
Where we last left off; I avoided being scammed by a lying broker who was completely unhelpful in getting me a NY apartment, by instead finding a room for rent by the tenants instead of trying to get a lease with a landlord who won't except people who aren't VERY well off.
Flashback to when I went to see the room and later that day, met all of the roommates. My roommates are a husband and his wife and their friend, to avoid using their real names, I'll call them Husband, Wife, and Friend. Husband showed me the basement space, it was one large room with a half bathroom. Husband said that the whole space will pretty much be mine, except for some stuff the were storing in the back corner portion of the room. When I asked if I would also be allowed to store things there, he said "I don't see why not", they had about 1/4 of that area filled with their stuff so I knew I would have plenty of room for storing my stuff there. He told me he would build a large bedroom where I would sleep, and add a shower to the half bathroom, these were their plans for the space so that they could rent it out. I later learned that they also planned to make a small bedroom in the storage area for guests. The space is actually kind of large so I thought they were going to maybe leave a storage area or either I could still store my stuff in there, just left to one side of the room and a bed could go on the other, fine. All of these renovations were going to be completed within the month before I got there so they said, great. Everything was friendly, sounded like a plan and a large space for me and my stuff, because as I told them and tell everyone, I have A LOT of stuff. They wanted to debate on which person to rent to for a few days, OK, well I am in the meantime leaving in the morning to head back to Pittsburgh and finish packing and things because I was moving to NY with or without that specific room, I could have let the movers put my stuff in storage for 30 days which was an included service had I told them in advance.
A few days later Wife, the main correspondent for this whole renting situation, texts that they chose me as the roommate in the basement. Hooray! I go about telling all my friends how although it's unfortunate that I wasn't getting my own apartment, that I was getting a whole basement space which is the size of a 1 bedroom apartment, so it's cool and a little less than an actual 1 br apt. That was when I started texting to know about the progress of the renovations and dimensions of all of the spaces, so I'll know how to fit my stuff. Ducked, and dodged every time, at first I'd get a "it's not done yet but try again next week, it'll be done then", and then I would get ignored or told that "I'll send the dimensions later" but then never received them. And as I was planning a big move, I didn't have time to dedicate all my time hounding them for information about the construction progress which Husband, a carpenter, was doing himself, which means that he can do it any time in the day that he has free.
Cut to a few days before my moving day, my sister informs me that she, my niece, and my dad are all coming to take me to NY and will stay the night and help me move in. I don't see a problem, we'll all be down in the basement, no big deal...WRONG! I texted Wife just fyi, my dad, sister, and niece will come up maybe stay a few nights with me and help me move in. Insert attitude! Actually insert the texts! *I am the picture, Wife is the bubble with a heart inside.
Can someone explain why I am getting attitude for having family move me to another state? Can someone explain why it is my fault that you didn't do your part that was to construct the basement shower that we would use? How is this a reason to be having an attitude and making a problem before I even move in? How is it not expected that someone moving long distance alone wouldn't have some sort of support or help at least upon moving in? Please someone answer this questions for me.
So where I said that "if this is just how you are then we would not make a good fit as roommates...", I should have stuck would that and took that last chance to get out of dodge.
This was the first warning sign of problems to come, right before I was on my way. But what could I do a couple days before moving, after I already put my deposit and signed the agreement? So I figured I can deal with it just keep to myself for 7 months then I'm done. But no, stay tuned for the biggest train wreck in this whole ordeal thus far in my next storytime...
*please excuse the alignment of these photos, blogger never wants to allow me to easily move around and properly align photos, the struggle is soo real!
I came here having traveled overnight by bus, ready to find my apartment, all documents and finances at hand ready to make a deal. Having conversed with my broker for a month already about my situation (no job, no 40x rent, no guarantor, yes great credit, yes lots of savings), that I was looking to live in the Brooklyn or possibly Harlem areas, and having him tell me "I know what you like" (referring to the kind of apt I was looking for) I figured I would have no problems finding a place. WRONG!! That first day, all I saw were duds. Too small was the main issue, which really shouldn't have been an issue, because if there is one thing that I was clear about, it's that I have A LOT OF STUFF, and thus want large (for new york standards) bedrooms, which is why I was aiming to live outside of manhattan. But everything that I saw was small! Day 1 was a fail and thus I lost faith in my broker and felt the need to resend him my ideal apartments which I was easily finding in the various apt sites online, and in my price range. Sending him my ideals was also a fail because he told me to stop, claiming that I wasn't letting him do his job. Well in my defense, what is the point of letting you "do your job" when you're showing me crap that I don't like? You clearly need my help, and my days are dwindling! But I did as he asked and stopped sending him apartments that I was interested in, but I didn't stop looking...
Day 2 comes and my broker is busy doing other things, thus I search on my own for places. After he told me to stop searching and to "let him do his job" I found some awesome apartments in my price range. The poster/broker for those places lived nearby and could immediately show me the places. I told her my situation via our email conversation (again to be clear I have no job, no 40x rent, no guarantor, yes great credit, yes lots of savings to pay rent until I find a job) and she came and picked me up! The first place that she showed me was ideal, she even had a friend who was looking to find a roommate in the summer (I was looking to obtain a roommate later) and it was cool, I filled out the application and then she realizes "oh, you don't have a job or a rich guarantor? You will not qualify!" Well that's just great, I wasted my time doing this and on top of that, I already told you of that stuff prior, so obviously you didn't really read the emails! That made me mad on many levels; first you weren't really paying attention to what I said in our correspondence (you just saw and jumped on an opportunity to make money) second I just got my hopes up for nothing! That apartment was adorable! But ok stay calm and keep looking.
Day 3, back to my original broker. He claimed to have a better list of showings for me, more my size. What do you know, 1 of the apartments was the same as what I saw the previous day through the other girl. I saw his apartments and the best one was the one the other girl had already shown me. I said "I like this one best but the girl already told me that because I don't fit the income requirements so the landlord won't rent to me" he says "oh". That "oh" told me a lot more than that. It said that this whole time, although he knew my situation (no job, no 40x rent, no guarantor, yes great credit, yes lots of savings), and was supposed to be finding me apartments based on that, he was really just trying to do anything to make a deal, showing me anything even if the landlord wouldn't accept a working class citizen like myself. That "oh" made me lose COMPLETE faith in him. And on top of him showing me a bunch of crappy apts, he made sure they were all at the top of my price range, the price I would ONLY pay if it was an apartment with every single feature that I asked for! And so I went to the "find a roommate" websites and set up some rooms to see the next (my last) day.
Day 4, my broker will not give up! He calls himself "helping" give me a woman's perspective (his female coworker) on NY apt renting, so that I will know that I am expecting too much and need to accept less. She mentions a 1 bedroom apt (I had previously been looking at 2brs) that is a quick 30 minutes from the city. I say ok, and go on about my room viewings, promising to look up the address later to see that the area, Bay Ridge (although not the area that I wanted) is actually nice. Well the rooms were all very small and very sad dorm room like situations, multiple rooms and a shared kitchen, no living room, no friendliness, just stay to your small room and share the kitchen and all is well...no thanks. Then I checked out the 1br Bay Ridge apt that my broker's female friend told me about to discover that it was a nice looking area, but it absolutely was not 30 minutes away, it was 50 minutes away from downtown!! What a lier!!! I called him and told him about this lie, and that I am no longer interested in his help, I'll just have to find a room for rent.
The last room I saw did seem like a true friendly roommate situation, with lots of space, although it costed a lot more the husband/roommate assured me that I would have my own large bedroom, a small living room and get to store things where he was also storing things in the basement "guest room". I liked it, it was a basement with a half bathroom, the space of a small one bedroom so I didn't mind paying considerable more for the space. So on my last day in NY looking to find an apartment, I found a room instead, but I wasn't homeless (although now I am regretting that decision).
What I learned from this experience is that all of the articles about skeevy NY brokers are right! You can't trust how nice they are because they just want your trust so that they can try to sell you a place and make their commission. They don't care if it's what you want, they will try and scare you into settling with claims of "this will go fast" "others are looking at this" "this is what the market is like, get used to it, accept it". You certainly can't tell them your budget because then they'll only show you things at the top of it, so that their commission is bigger. And, to real you in from the beginning, some brokers will post great apartments to get you to call, but when you inquire they'll say that the apartment was already sold. I'm pretty sure my broker did that to get me, and then proceeded to question me about what I wanted and act like he could certainly find what I wanted and in my price range. But no, he didn't.
For more info, check out this Huffington Post article by Hilary Rowland, 8 Truths About NYC Real Estate Brokers: Beware! I found it to be quite accurate of my 4 days spent with 3 different brokers. Although the main culprit is the one who I specifically came to NY to have him find me the place, the girl who showed me the place I wanted to rent, didn't play games, she didn't pay attention to my email, but she wasn't trying to cheat me or show me crap either. I guess if you actually do have good apartments to offer, you don't have to resort to tricks.
Do you have a related broker story to share or any bad experiences trying to get an apartment in NYC or anywhere else? Comment and let me know.
Stay tuned for my next blog post on how I am now living in NY.
Monday, February 15, 2016
So what's with diets? You'd think being calorie conscious would be helpful. I'm purposefully trying to eat far less meal calories (more veges and less carbs , 500 cals or less per meal), because I don't want to exercise and do want to leave room to drink my calories (wine, rum, or schnapps) after a day of hard work. Do I need to stop eating altogether and only drink at the end of the day in order to lose some weight? Does drinking slow your metabolism more? Who knows the answer to these questions?
Losing weight is annoying but busting out of your clothes is even more annoying.