Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Fool Move: Bee Attack on the Bus

I was on a packed bus in my own little world sitting at the window seat watching JRE's Miss A - HUSH Mv Reaction YouTube video on my phone when suddenly, a bee flew over my phone and landed on the window right next to me, inches away from my face!  Automatically, I jumped to the right, away from the bee.  The bee started flying along the window, going away from me, so I sat back upright, trying to act normal.  Then the bee started coming back towards me!  

When the bee flew towards me I jumped to the right, when it flew away I felt relieved and let out the breathe I was holding, then just when I thought I was safe, it came towards me again!  Eventually I felt someone next to me moving toward the right when I moved, and back when I moved back.  I looked to the right and realized that I was like on top of this guy who had been sitting beside me through this whole bee ordeal trying to read a book.  I had basically been jumping into the lap of "guy who reads" who had been sitting next to me this whole time, forcing him to move right and left as the bee came near me and moved away from me.  To everyone who saw us, we probably looked like two fools doing a weird dance, swaying left and right like drunkards.

I'm usually not scared of bees, but this time I'm trapped right next to it!  I got the bee against the window on my left, my large book bag in my lap, and "guy who reads" on my right.  I can barely move and have nothing to kill it with.  I seriously contemplated smashing it with my hand.  Me being slightly delirious, unable to focus on anything except for the fact that there is a bee who keeps trying to attack me, barely looks at "guy who reads" face but I say, "Sorry, there's a bee", and he's like, "it's OK".   Finally, after my the 7th time jumping into his lap, I'm like ,"Uh uh, I gotta get up", so he lets me out of the bee prison that I was in and I basically throw myself into the seat across from that one (opposite of where the bee is).  I look next to me and I'm now sitting in the isle seat next to a guy that's looking at me like I'm the craziest thing he's seen all year (and I know that ain't true cuz he's obviously a student, and there's a few crazy Tourette Syndrome people who often wonder around Oakland cussing at random people), and he is surrounded by gym bags.  I say "sorry, there was a bee over there".  He just looks away like he's thinking, this girl is nutz.  I bow my head in shame because of course "guy with gym bags" is cute, and now he thinks I'm crazy.  Great.

I feel "guy who reads" looking at me so I apologize again and say, "sorry I couldn't deal with that bee".  He just has a smirk on his face.  Seconds later, the guy right in front of where I had been sitting, kills the bee (like a boss).  Really?!  You wait until I have about 12 panic attacks, disturb "guy who reads" and "guy with gym bags", and move my seat.  Then you decide enough is enough, and kill the bee?  Thanks dude, thanks!

I try to make myself feel better thinking, well at least I didn't scream, which really would have made me look insane on this overly crowded bus.

"Guy who reads" smirks at me again as he gets up to get off the bus.  I finally look fully at his face and realize, this guy who I'd been jumping on to get away from the bee, is also cute, and he reads (just my type)!  Now he's obviously getting off the bus laughing to himself about my being all over him trying to get away from a killer bee...

In summary, thanks to a bee who was killed 2 minutes after trying repeatedly to attack me,  I have succeeded in looking like a fool in front of not 1, but 2 cute guys on the bus.  I may have also unintentionally sexually harrassed the 1 who reads.

Awesome.

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